Friday, April 12, 2013

Moving to Mexico - An Interesting Summation

Sent to me by a friend. Hey, writer, you clear the way with Barak and I'll follow you.
Dear Mr. Obama:
I'm planning to move my family and extended family
into Mexico for my health, and I would like to ask you
to assist me.
We're planning to simply walk across the border from the U.S.
into Mexico, and we'll need your help to make a few arrangements.
We plan to skip all the legal stuff like visas, passports,
immigration quotas and laws.
I'm sure they handle those things the same way you do
here. So, would you mind telling your buddy, The President
of Mexico, that I'm on my way over?
Please let him know that I will be expecting the following:
1. Free medical care for my entire family.
2. English-speaking government bureaucrats for all services
I might need, whether I use them or not.
3. Please print all Mexican Government forms in English.
4. I want my grandkids to be taught Spanish by English-
speaking (bi-lingual) teachers.
5. Tell their schools they need to include classes on
American culture and history.
6. I want my grandkids to see the American flag on one
of the flag poles at their school.
7. Please plan to feed my grandkids at school for both
breakfast and lunch.
8. I will need a local Mexican driver's license so I can get
easy access to government services.
9. I do plan to get a car and drive in Mexico, but I don't
plan to purchase car insurance, and I probably won't make
any special effort to learn local traffic laws.
10. In case one of the Mexican police officers does not get
the memo from their president to leave me alone, please be
sure that every patrol car has at least one English-speaking
11. I plan to fly the U.S. flag from my housetop, put U.S. flag
decals on my car, and have a gigantic celebration on July 4th.
I do not want any complaints or negative comments from the
12. I would also like to have a nice job without paying any taxes,
or have any labor or tax laws enforced on any business I may start.
13. Please have the president tell all the Mexican people to
be extremely nice and never say critical things about me or
my family, or about the strain we might place on their economy.
14. I want to receive free food stamps.
15. Naturally, I'll expect free rent subsidies.
16. I'll need income tax credits so that although I don't pay
Mexican taxes, I'll receive money from the government.
17. Please arrange it so that the Mexican Government pays
$4,500.00 to help me buy a new car.
18. Oh yes, I almost forgot, please enroll me free into the Mexican
Social Security program so that I'll get a monthly income in retirement.
I know this is an easy request because you already
do all these things for all his people who walk over to
the U.S. from Mexico. I am sure that the President
of Mexico won't mind returning the favor if you ask him nicely.
Look how crazy this looks when you put it in writing!!!

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