Phil Luciano: PJS Reporter

Unlucky 44 year old Deborah Seifert, a business woman forced to fly on a cramped seat airplane and placed beside a large man reading a Playboy Magazine. The guy placed his leg next to hers and she was forced to sit there for the two hour flight.This is all reported in the JS today.

Wow, this should be front page news. But let’s examine the 44 year old's story, or so it’s said, businessladyperson dilemma.

Being a 44 year old businessperson indicates she has probably flown a lot in her day. Most, if not all business people traveling do not waste their time looking over to see what their neighbor is reading. If they are of any value to the company they represent, they should be working on their laptop, boning up on the reason for their travel, studying backgrounds of their clients, learning more about their products or about their company. Better yet, she could have been reading any Middle East history book or novel. Sheesh.

Maybe this is a plea to get her company to fly her FIRST CLASS next time.

What was her fascination with what the guy in the next seat was reading? She says she tried to close her eyes, wow what a prude or maybe deep down she is fascinated with the beauty of a picture of the beauty of most naked women who allow themselves to appear in print. Being a 44 year old woman and disgusted by a picture of a naked woman, which she evidently couldn’t stop looking at, raises questions which are to obvious for me to ask..

The big question is why was she sticking her nose into what a perfectly legal (if he was obese, maybe his legs took more space) acting guy was reading? Hmmmm.

So the “large” older guy (could that have been Phil Luciano, he’s “large”?) was drinking a beer. Perfectly legal. What’s the story there?

“His leg was against mine the entire trip” says Deborah. Wow, is that close? Are you sure she wasn’t flying in a Piper Cub? I suggest his leg wasn’t that bothersome or she should HAVE MOVED HER LEG. Yet she didn’t complain to the flight attendants because she was intimidated by him. How old was she 44? And an experienced business person who flies often on business? Sheesh.

So she doesn’t complain to any airline official about anything. So she finds a sympathetic ear in Luciano. If Phil wasn’t on the plane she made contact with him somehow. Did she call him, go to his office or go to his home or see him in say, one Phil’s favorite hangouts. Does she have a “business” relationship with Phil?

More important didn't Phil contact the man and get his side of the story? He could have filed a complaint with the airline and an attorney could have gotten the name of this “large” intrusive passenger.

And now Phil, who threw furniture (he published he did) off balconies into the street; I suspect Luciano knows a lot about drinking, is a judge on Porno. Wow, did he see it first hand? And if you are reading and looking at porno in a seat you have paid for legally; Playboy magazine is sold in most all bookstores across the country, where is the problem? Or are the Muslims in this country turning us into radicals like the Taliban?

Why didn’t Phil quote Deborah’s surely incensed husband. Or, if not a husband, her closest friend? Or her dad? Or maybe she is one of these men-haters or a radical member of NOW. After all, this large guy had his leg against his wife’s leg for TWO WHOLE HOURS! Or should he have just used common sense and asks her why she didn’t move her leg and if the guy kept encroaching on her space, why didn’t she tell the attendant. Oh, Yes, I forgot, she was a fearful 44 year old business person.

And, oh yes, how large is Deborah? Her size on a crowded seat plane must fit in this equation somehow.

This I will say. If she had she been working for me when Phil printed this hare-brained article; she would be looking for a new job today. And if Luciano would have been working or teaching under me, he would not have been dragging my paper down to the caliber of rag and contaminating the minds of students struggling to find a life outside of academics.

Wow, what a story, okay, it's a column telling a story, surely to be presented in some type of writing contest to win some kind of award.

Now, it’s my time to tell a story. Back years ago, as a salesman I was calling on a local hospital purchasing agent. I had in my employ a lovely blonde young lady who also called on this purchasing agent for another division of my company. Bob, his correct first name, the PA complimented me on the competence of the young blonde. I made the mistake asking if he preferred to have her handle his account instead of me. A perfectly innocent question as PA’s are given choices of who they prefer to deal with in a company. That’s where the s...t the fan. Suddenly, old Bob was accusing me of saying that he “liked” Diane. He went bonkers. Shorten the story. My company lost the account. The reason was that good old Bob had a boyfriend and he was afraid the story might get around the hospital and eventually back to his man “friend”. I was pretty naïve. But then I was just in my forty’s.

I don’t know if my last paragraph fits in with my blog but I printed it and it is a true story. Some of you may remember old Bob who I understand is deceased so you can’t reach him to confirm or hear his side of the story.

And I do all this common sense writing for no pay. But I’m not complaining because I never took a class to learn journalism. But having flown a couple million miles in my life, I know a lot about how not to be offended by someone in the next seat to me and also how not to offend. And yes, I have complained to a stewardess about other passengers. Never had a real problem worth complaining to a hack reporter.